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Panthers Trying To Throwback to Come Back



The latest effort of the Carolina Panthers to return to the days of glory is to take a page out of the Disney playbook and try to reestablish an upgraded version of the things that worked in the past. This new project features efforts to return the Carolina Panthers into reminders about their better years of the past. Week one already displayed some of the magic of the late '90s and pre-Super Bowl, '00s by losing heartbreakingly to a team they probably should have beaten.

DJ Moore and Shi Smith are in competition for the role of Steve Smith already. They are practicing improvised touchdown celebrations, kickoff returns, punt returns, and trash talking their way into Panthers history. Shi Smith already has the height and the last name. They both will still remain on the team as they need someone to play Philly Brown.

Baker Mayfield extended his height by four inches and worked on overthrowing passes beyond the back of the endzone to channel his Cam Newton look. Although he was hesitant to wear such flamboyant clothing, Baker admitted the shoes are comfortable once he slipped his feet in the pearly gates of the sole.

To establish himself to look more like DeAngelo Williams, running back Christian McCafferey grew dreadlocks. He still will also be playing Christian McCafferey too. But the Panthers need a two-running back system if they're going to emulate the glory days. He wanted the role of Mike Tolbert but failed to do such a great dirty bird impersonation. So they suggested he play Nick Goings.

Brandon Smith has had to learn to stop cussing so much to portray Thomas Davis. They considered moving him to Lamar Lathon. But when he chopped off his leg and started clubbing tight ends in practice with it, everyone knew he was committed to the role.

Frankie Luvu's decision to grow a fabulous long, blonde hair to honor the late Kevin Greene was worrisome for the coaching staff. But when they saw how good that hair looked during a tackle, they were overjoyed. Still, the assistant coaches maintained their distance and wore neck pillows when he was nearby.

Brian Burns took on the role of Julius Peppers. It wasn't easy to do so much work and get only a little praise. But somehow, it seemed like a natural choice.

Although Matt Rhule has worked in the past on his George Seifert impersonation, he thought he might try something a little different: Since he can't play a has-been, he thought he might try to be a winner. Whether that translates into late 2010 John Fox or early '00s John Fox remains to be seen.

PJ Walker wanted the role of Steve Beuerlein. But at this point in his career, he seems to be more like Chris Weinke.

The controversial redevelopment of old projects took an unfortunate turn as David Tepper's family paid for a statue of him standing between two Panthers in front of Bank of America Stadium. Panthers fans were upset until they noticed the prices of concessions returned to the same prices of the 1990s.

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