We commence week 3 of our anonymous quarterback comparison with a change in time slots because we just now remembered that Monday Night Football exists. Is that a clue to the identities of either quarterback? Does Nick Foles (pictured above) count as a transplant face of a franchise? Who knows. Let’s just get to it.
Quarterback A completed 17/28 passes, or 60 percent, for 162 yards, one touchdown, and one interception. They also took two sacks for a loss of six yards while rushing for 27 yards and zero touchdowns on 9 carries. They won their game.
Overall, Quarterback A has completed 62/91 passes, or 68 percent, for 714 yards, two touchdowns, and two interceptions, while taking five sacks for a loss of 21 yards. They have rushed 35 times for 149 yards and four touchdowns. That makes seven total touchdowns and two turnovers on the season. Their team is 2-1 on the season.
Quarterback B completed 22/28 passes, or 78 percent, for 235 yards, one touchdown, and zero interceptions. They also took two sacks for a loss of 14 yards while rushing for 12 yards and zero touchdowns on two carries. They won their game.
Overall, Quarterback B has completed 77/104 passes, or 74 percent, for 871 yards, two touchdowns, and two interceptions, while taking eight sacks for a loss of 51 yards and losing one fumble. They have rushed six times for 38 yards, and zero touchdowns. That makes two total touchdowns and three turnovers on the season. Their team is 1-2 on the season.
Remember that either of these guys could be anybody who changed franchises this year who also used to be the face of a franchise. That means Tom Brady, Phillip Rivers, Nick Foles, Cam Newton, Kyle Allen, Jameis Winston, Nick Foles, Teddy Bridgewater, Tyrod Taylor, or even a time-traveling Aaron Rodgers feeding me data from next year with the Vikings.
This process is completely blind and anonymous and other words that imply obfuscation. We will, with great difficulty, peel back the curtain at the end of the season so we can compare who is who, who did what, and how we felt about each of their performances (otherwise divorced of team success) both before and after we confirmed our deeply held and completely unfounded suspicions of their identities.