To get us prepared for Sunday’s game against the Atlanta Falcons, the CSR staff decided to have a little fun at Dan Quinn’s expense by borrowing the ‘looks like game’ concept from The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz on ESPN.
Ed. Note - The Looks Like Game is the best thing that anyone does at ESPN and it’s not even close. If you’ve never experienced it before I highly recommend it. Trust me.
Below is a collection of our best efforts to figure out exactly what/who Dan Quinn looks like. Feel free to discuss your favorite ones in the comments section, and you can even provide your own if you feel up to it.
Disclaimer: This is all in good fun. We’re not trying to hurt anyone’s feelings here, so if you happen to stumble across this Dan, we sincerely hope you understand that we’re mostly kidding.
Dan Quinn looks like...
- Dan Quinn looks like a guy who's really excited to tell you about the gas mileage he gets in his new truck.
- Dan Quinn looks like a guy who is ready to offer you 0% interest for 24 months on a $600 couch.
- Dan Quinn looks like he owns a dozen Planet Fitness locations.
- Dan Quinn looks like the manager of the produce department at Walmart.
- Dan Quinn looks like the Jiffy Lube tech who recommends a bunch of stuff your car doesn't need when you're getting the oil changed.
- Dan Quinn looks like a guy who has never given nor received a punch to the face, but has threatened someone within the past week.
- Dan Quinn looks like a high school gym teacher who regales his health ed classes with tales of when he played against a big NFL star in his high school glory days.
- Dan Quinn looks like the guy who responds to everything with an unwanted "no, what you need to do is..."
- Dan Quinn looks like a human "Tap Out" shirt.
- Dan Quinn looks like a failed cloning attempt of Jesse Ventura.
- Dan Quinn looks like the guy politicians bring on stage during a rally to show how much they care about the working class.
- Dan Quinn looks like the guy who "can't wait to see how Junior does at Martinsville next week".
- Dan Quinn looks like ‘Generic Face 3’ in the create-a-character section of a video game.
- Dan Quinn looks like the former bike gang member who has cleaned up his act and is now your AA sponsor.
- Dan Quinn looks like the guy who asks you for a cigarette, and when you tell him you don't smoke, says "Good, Don't."
- Dan Quinn looks like he just visited his new beachfront property in Iowa.
- Dan Quinn looks like a guy who likes to trade 'war stories' at the VFW even though he's never seen combat.
- Dan Quinn looks like he'll tell anybody who will listen that he isn't waiting any longer for the city to fix that damn pothole.
- Dan Quinn looks like the parent who gets kicked out of the little league park for shouting profanity at the umpire after his kid strikes out.
- Dan Quinn looks like he is about to give you a really high estimate on fixing your air conditioner.
- Dan Quinn looks like the UPS driver who, after a long day at work, looks forward to cracking open a cold one at the local bar while neglecting his high school trophy wife at home, who is secretly having an affair with his manager at UPS, Matt Ryan.
- Dan Quinn looks like the guy who always requests the booth at Applebees below his high school football team photo, so he can point at himself and ask his wife "remember when I was that handsome?" as she soullessly eats her Whiskey BBQ Bacon Burger.
- Dan Quinn looks like he mows his lawn at 6 in the morning because he wants to prove a point that he runs the neighborhood.
- Dan Quinn looks like the car salesman who berates you for not signing up for the extended warranty.
- Dan Quinn looks like a guy who knows way too much about wrenches.
- Dan Quinn looks like a guy who brings the monitor with him when dropping off his computer for repair.
- Dan Quinn looks like a guy who lifts up his shorts a little too high before he sits down.
- Dan Quinn looks like the guy on the bottle of the newest testosterone enhancement supplement at GNC.
And of course, we’ve got Super Bowl jokes...
- Dan Quinn looks like a guy who could lose the Super Bowl, but sleep that night on the pillow of three quarters of victory.
- Dan Quinn looks like a guy who spend the rest of the night gloating after the manager at Outback comped his Bloomin' Onion for recognizing "he's the guy who lost that big game that one time."
- Dan Quinn looks like he could dominate three quarters of a SB and still lose.
Which ones are your favorites, Panthers fans?