Fuzzy Wuzzy wuz a Gettleman: A Panther's free agency primer

He's at least a little fuzzy. . . - Brian Spurlock-USA TODAY Sports

I thought I would offer a follow-up to Brian's excellent analysis of our new general manager. The following is a football layman's guide to the new Carolina Panthers' front office.

Fuzzy Wuzzy wuz a Gettleman,
He didn't believe in early settlemen's
Fuzzy Wuzzy took care to plan
On low-key signings like Roman.

Fuzzy Wuzzy gave people quite a scare,
They woke to find he didn't have much hair.
Fuzzy Wuzzy had been shaving with great care,
But now he had very little hair to spare.

We're not yet sure if Fuzzy has plugged in his phones,
Because his roster looks like skin and bones.
Fuzzy Wuzzy will soon have to start throwing stones,
Hoping to land somebody like James Jones.

Fuzzy Wuzzy's fans can run him over with an armored truck,
But this man won't even know if he has been struck.
Fuzzy Wuzzy will not bag a 12 point buck,
Even at the risk that the 2014 Panthers will suck.

This franchise is not a family under Fuzzy Wuzzy.
Get too old and he will no longer call you Cuz...y.
Soon the media will get really buzzy,
Saying that Gettleman was never very Fuzzy, was he?

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