Right folks… another week in the bank, another loss for Oi2dwrld… He’s getting over a bad case of chlamydia he picked up from Mrs. Oi so you get the pleasure of me doing this week’s write up.
And what a week it was…. Only two teams remain at 3-0 and even that was a close thing. Gross miscalculation continues to boss the league, scoring the third straight biggest blow out against the now 0-3 Joe Buck yourself- but ALAC’s Thor’s Hammer left it very late to maintain their 100% winning record against a desperately unlucky sippin’ on Ginn n Juice. Now we head to week 4 where things get interesting- bye’s now factor in so get checking your team! NO FREE PASSES IN CSR2!!!
It was of course a successful week for yours truly, the dozens and dozens of Jim Skipper fans out there in the CSR universe can rest easy again as I take my rightful place at the head of CSR2 Division 1… that seems like a good place to start our recaps:-
Jim Skipper 109.58 vs Release the Kraken 64.36.
Wow Mike you suck. I have seen you radiance and I’ve decided that actually I don’t think I will bask in it. I expect to see your sig changed! In the words of yahoo ‘Jim Skipper smashed Release the Kraken’… ouch. That’s me 2-0 in the division (shame that means absolutely nothing).
Wile E’s Coyotes 119.94 vs Crazy 88’s 61.56.
Yahoo’s verdict - Wile E's Coyotes got the second-highest score this week, annihilating Crazy 88's 119.94 - 61.56. Crazy 88's is having trouble getting started and is winless… phahaha Jesus Oi… you continue to get spanked at every turn. Lucky for you next up is another 0-3 team so maybe somehow you’ll finally get a win. P.S thanks for Doug Martin and Eric Decker. Olds continues his impressive start to the year and moves in 3rd place overall.
Queen City Cats 68.84 vs Kuechly is beastly 51.06.
My god what a pile of turd this game was. In the battle of who can suck the most unsurprisingly Kuechly is beastly, like some veteran toothless hooker, proved that they suck the most. Both teams played one player each who scored 0… nothing, zilch, zip, sweet fuck all. All I can say is… you are both terrible. More on Dipen later.
Goodell can’t lose 88.62 vs Monster Energy 79.70
Finally Goodell can’t lose gets a win. Monster Energy was in top spot before losing this winless excuse of a team. As per Yahoo - Goodell Can't Lose overcame an 11.56-point spread to pull off the upset. They were led by Cam Newton who put up the second-highest player point total in the league this week with 35.42. Well congrats on getting your first win – we’ll see if you can keep up the momentum against winless Sippin’ on Ginn and Juice next week.
Thor’s Hammer 90.64 vs Sippin’ on Ginn and Juice 84.80
Thor's Hammer earned their third consecutive win when they beat Sippin' Ginn N Juice 90.64 - 84.80 in a Monday night comeback states Yahoo. Stroking the Kitty must have felt they were on their way to the first victory of the season but alas no… they were denied. Sort it out STK, you one of many anchors dragging down the quality of CSR2.
Gross Miscalculation 162.46 vs Joe Buck Yourself 99.50
Gross Miscalculation got the highest point total this season on the way to their third win in as many matchups when they annihilated Joe Buck Yourself. The streak is due in part to Gross Miscalculation having the highest scoring output in the league at 140.91 points per matchup. Wow… another huge win for Busy being an Arsehole. You must be very proud… next week you get some real competition so we’ll see how you do then before anointing you as champ. Joe Buck yourself is battling it out with the crazy 88’s to see which team can stay winless the longest… next week will provide an answer. I wouldn’t be surprised if you draw you worthless idiots.
And now this week’s Pathetic Effort.
Bhahahahahaha Dipen WTF was that that. Keuchly hahaha is BHAHAHAHA Beastly???? Maybe you should consider a name change. The lowest score of the season… and incredibly pathetic 51.06. I know- lets analyse the result further, which should help Dipen get over this rather tragic loss amiright? Well starting Eli manning was a hilarious mistake I’m sure you’ll never make again; he rocked up an unbelievably bad 4.16. Well at least that must have been the lowest score on your te…. What’s this? Owen Daniels scored 2.90? Buffalo Defence and special teams scored 1.00 (against THE JETS!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHA) and oh dear….Daryl Richardson scored 0.00. Dipen what a cluster fuck of a team you’ve assembled. Your Bench scored more than your team. Bow your head in shame. You talk a big game but then get humiliated….. Ouch. Good luck next week.
Right that’s it. Go for the jugular and let your vanquished opponents know how much they suck.