| Sign Up | Google+
 

Building the Panthers, the Darrelle Revis way

Stay connected for news and updates

Ed Mulholland-US PRESSWIRE

Fancying himself an astute judge of NFL talent, it's time for the Jets' corner to fix the Carolina Panthers.

Few things are more enjoyable than Twitter fights between players. There's something churlish about two grown men having playground-style arguments for the whole world to see -- let alone elite NFL athletes. In case you missed it, yesterday evening Darrelle Revis of the New York Jets, and the Seahawks' Richard Sherman had a back-and-forth over who's the better cornerback. Sherman pointed to his interception numbers as a key indicator, while Revis... well... he pointed to the number of Twitter followers he has. This is an admirable approach to predicting success, so in honor of Darrelle Revis, we're letting him play Carolina Panthers GM to give us the best team possible.

Offense

Quarterback

Jimmy Clausen (45,851 followers)

Cam Newton chooses not to have a Twitter account, but no matter, there's still Jimmy! Waiting in the wings since 2010, the Revis model thrusts him back into the limelight with over 45,000 screaming Clausen-iacs waiting for his return.

Running Back

Jonathan Stewart (79,003 followers)

The system works! The Panthers keep their future prospects bright by starting Stewart at RB. An injury in 2012 isn't enough to sideline him this year, especially with that many followers.

Fullback

DeAngelo Williams (28,792 followers)

Okay, so maybe this is a cop out, but it's Mike Tolbert's fault for not having an account. Not sure how D-Will works as a lead blocker, but who cares? This is Revis-ball.

Tight End

Greg Olsen (74,875 followers)

An easy choice here. The U!

Wide Receivers

1: Louis Murphy (27,507 followers)

2: Joe Adams (21,210 followers)

Foolproof. This field was really handicapped because Steve Smith doesn't have an account, and Brandon LaFell's private account makes it tough to find. Nevertheless, the Revis system doesn't lie. Two short-yardage receivers will be perfect for Jimmy's lack of arm strength.

Offensive Line

LT: Byron Bell (3,980 followers)

LG: Amini Silatolu (4,073 followers)

C: Ryan Kalil (24,939 followers)

RG: J.J. Jansen (5,474 followers)

RT: Garry Williams (2,219 followers)

It's time for J.J. to hang up his long snapping...cleats? gloves? Whatever long snappers use. Anyway, he's playing RG now on the Revis lineup. Pass blocking is overrated, and this line shows it.

Defense

Defensive End

Frank Alexander (11,540 followers)

Charles Johnson (11,327 followers)

Sorry Kraken, you just need more followers.

Defensive Tackle

Greg Hardy (5,561 followers)

Sione Fua (2,664 followers)

There, we found a place for you!

Linebacker

James Anderson (9,280 followers)

Jon Beason (58,288 followers)

Thomas Davis (17,657 followers)

Sorry Luke, no Twitter, no dice. It's a return to linebacker's past for Carolina, and that's not really a bad thing.

Cornerback

Captain Munnerlyn (16,383 followers)

Josh Norman (2,950 followers)

Revis knows corners, so this one is simple. Captain Munnerlyn is five-times the CB that Josh Norman is.

Safety

Sherrod Martin (5,287 followers)

D.J. Campbell (2,227 followers)

Done, and done.

                                                                                                                                                                                                               

Recent Posts

Stay connected for news and updates

The Next Read

There are 70 Comments. Load Now. Loading

Shortcuts to mastering the comment thread. Use wisely.

C - Next Comment
X - Mark as Read

R - Reply
Z - Mark Read & Next

Shift + C - Previous
Shift + A - Mark All Read

Comment Settings

Live comment alert: Hide it!

Comments for this post are closed.

tracking_pixel_5341_tracker tracking_pixel_5351_tracker