You sir, are a bard.
Carolina Panthers' defensive end Greg Hardy is a unique individual. Whether it's tearing down the goalpost in Chicago by accident, referring to himself as 'The Kraken' (a nickname started here on CSR), or trash talking an eleven win team -- Hardy makes sure you know he's around. Talking to the media today, Greg Hardy needed to address the situation in Charlotte over the weekend where he and Falcons' kicker Matt Bryant engaged in a verbal altercation midfield post-game. What followed was the most Greg Hardy thing Greg Hardy has ever said.
"I really didn't know who he was. He's so small and weird-shaped. I was trying to figure out what he did. I had to go home and look him up on the internet."
(H/T to Joe Person, via Twitter)
You're kidding me... no, seriously... you're kidding me.
"SMALL AND WEIRD-SHAPED"!
This is hands down, uncontested, the greatest single thing a member of the Carolina Panthers have said in the media. Honestly, I don't even know what comes close. Matt Bryant is 5-9, 200-lbs which is about average for a man in the United States. Hardy feels this is inadequate, and when you're 6-4, 290-lbs I suppose it is.
Here's to you, small and weird-shaped one.