Dear NFL Retirees: You know those helmets you wear? They aren’t there just to look pretty.

While the lockout seems to be reaching near its end, 75 NFL Retirees have recently hit the NFL with a lawsuit claiming that the NFL withheld information for years about the dangers of concussions.

“The suit alleges the NFL knew as early as the 1920s of the harmful effects of concussions but concealed them from coaches, trainers, players and the public until June 2010. It also names helmet-maker Riddell, the NFL’s official helmet supplier.”

Let me ask you guys something. I’m sure that this kind of question will blow your mind and give the world a brand new meaning. Let me make this absolutely clear: This very question alone will change your entire viewpoint on football. You will never be the same again.

Did you know that football is a contact sport?

That’s right. That bulky padding you wear and the hardhat you wear on your head isn’t there to make you look bigger and prettier for the camera. It is meant to protect your body from harm. That little list of players who can’t play each Sunday called IR is made for players that have suffered broken legs, fingers, arms, and god knows what else. When you throw your body against someone else helmet to helmet and do it for 10 years to expect to come out on the other side with absolutely no injuries at all, you are insane.

Are you really trying to tell me that the NFL is supposed to warn you about concussions? Really? What the heck is the NFL supposed to say?

“Good evening! This is a National Football League public service announcement! Ramming your head continuously into another person make cause internal brain injuries! Make sure you take precaution! Also in the news, fire is hot and water is cold! Staying in the sun for too long can cause skin cancer! Cats are fun to pet, but petting lions are dangerous!”

I mean goodness, what else is there to say? Hell, let’s say I was driving down the road and I ran over a pothole. I should sue the state government for not putting a sign pointing down at the pothole saying “LOOK! THERE IS A POTHOLE HERE! DRIVE AWAY FROM IT OR YOU MAY GET A FLAT TIRE AND CAUSE HARM TO YOUR VEHICLE!”

Use your common sense.

Why stop with the NFL? We have a big money train going here! Why don’t we sue the NCAA for not letting their college players know that running into other players at high speeds may hurt you? Aren’t they just as responsible for the NFL for letting players know that they might incur injuries if they play a sports game?

Why don’t we sue the high schools for neglect and mistreatment of minors? What happens if they get a concussion and end up in a wheelchair the rest of their life? They get NOTHING! That's right! Nothing! Because they never grew up a famous person and they were never good enough to get into the NFL! They get squat because they never became a household name!

This is a terrible game that promotes hurtful violence in our society and therefore it must be banned before it corrupts the young people with evil! We must establish love and comfort circles in our schools to replace sports so that our children can gain entertainment by hugging each other instead of playing these hateful, ignorant sport games where 50% of the players involved are sad because they lost the game.

Apparently in this world today, no one is responsible for the consequences of their actions. Everyone has to point the finger at the other person and say, “It’s their fault!” instead of looking at themselves, the results of the decisions they’ve made in life, and figure out how they can solve it themselves

That is why lawsuits like this exist.

Thus ends my rant.