FanPost

the Diamond Fang

Yo, your now tuned in Panther Molecules, AKA, the Diamond Fang.  Skip the introductions and all that, Ima go ahead and jump into this one by saying that yesterday's game was one those that really make you want to go outside and punch a hole in the side walk, nah mean? Molecules usually keeps it to just reading yall post your wisdom on this site and respecting the fact a bigger wealth of knowledge can't be found anywhere else in the universe than what gets put down right here on this website.  Usually, I just try to soak up the knowledge yall drop and leave it at that, keep my own to my own, nah mean?  But yo, this game had the type of story book ending that had the Diamond Fang ready to rip the front door off the hinge and throw that shit down town, nah mean?  So Ima go ahead and use this as an outlet to say a few things that need to be said.

Yo, I seen the message boards, throwing Mare under the bus and all that and yeah, we all need a scape goat, but deep down yall know that this one don't land on him.  Truth be told though, if given the chance, I'd probably still flip him backwards off a building for missing that kick.  But I'm not gonna sit here and blame son for the whole debacle, nah mean? I seen a few people blaming Cam and what not, but yo the god don't even care to comment on that ignorant bullshit.  But if that's how you feel, I'm not going to hate.  The Kingdom had a lot on the line yesterday, going into the bye with a win and a realistic shot at beating Tennessee could've passed a month before the last Panther loss, so I get it, nah mean, you gotta have someone to blame.

For me personally, I blame my girl.  Your boy was all posted up on the couch with his ritual bojangles box and I had just chewed up the last bone, when Money had ripped the ball out of Harvin's hands, threw em' down and stomped on the boys chest all in one motion.  Yo I started licking my fingers for the chicken and for the fact that I thought we were about to go up 21-7 and get the ball at the half.  Right at that moment, my girl bust through the door, yo and being in the good mood I was in, I actually broke my focus from the television screen and gave her a good greeting.  About the time that I turned back around, the ball was on the ground son, and the purple ferries had recovered.  Yo at the moment, I thought about telling my girl to leave.  It was a clear message from the gods that they were not satisfied with her presence in the realm of the Panthers, but I chose not to listen.  

 From that point on though, the god felt unsettled.  An unwelcoming feeling came over Molecules.  Yo that feeling was amplified when the Panthers came out in the 2nd half.  It was weird though and I couldn't exactly put my finger on it, but something had changed.  To that point, the defense had been carrying out the will of Zeus, nah mean?  But something wasn't right.   I tried to figure it out as hard as I could, but the answer was evading me.  After about the third time Toby gashed us for a 20 yard run, I knew that something had gone horribly wrong.  So what I did was drop down to my hands and knees and crawl over to the TV screen.  Yo I got my eyes up real close to the screen during one of the Panther's defensive huddles and I focused all of my energy and squinted my eyes.  Yo and right then, the answer appeared before my eyes.  Some of you may have seen the shit too, but if you looked really closely and focused all your energy and squinted your eyes like I did, you would have seen little purple and pink heart-shaped bubbles emitting from the Panthers defensive huddle.  Zeus had dropped the reigns b.  He sensed the presence of my girl within his kingdom and he dropped the reigns.  That's my bad, I should have kicked my girl out of the kingdom the first time I sensed that something was wrong.  Usually the Diamond Fang is more in-tune with the will of the football gods.  Anyway, I apologize to all you for this weeks loss. 

Handing out the soft as three-ply, purple cloud helmet stickers for the week, I gotta give one to everybody on the team whose name is not Cam or Smitty.  Those are the only two players we got right now that don't feel the need to go skip across lily-pads and cartwheel through meadows before they take the field.  There's other players like Captain Money or Ryan Kalil that probably don't partake in these activities either, but they gotta be held accountable.  Next time the Panthers decide to take the team bus down to McDonald's at half-time, Money and Kalil, need to be like "maybe yall shouldn't order the McBitch combo with cheese. Word up, because right now, back at the BOA, Cam and Smitty are eating chains and glass.  Aight, Peace.

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